


Oral Arguments

by spiders_n



Series: The Fruit of Boredom - Quarantine 2k20 [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: And the result of me being HornyTM because of this quarantine, Idk what to tell y'all it's just a short little fic that I wrote in roughly 40 mins, M/M, Smut, Snark, This is the result of a writing game i'm playing with my roommate, Tony and Steve use arguing as foreplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:08:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23389291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spiders_n/pseuds/spiders_n
Summary: Steve and Tony can't stop arguing and their friends are over it.Everyone seems to have the same solution to the problem.One day the two men test it out.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Series: The Fruit of Boredom - Quarantine 2k20 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1682332
Comments: 1
Kudos: 93





	Oral Arguments

**Author's Note:**

> Proof that i can write something that doesn't have Peter in it.

It started out as a joke. 

Innocent enough. 

The group of them were in a post-battle briefing, worn out and dirty and in desperate need of a goddamn break. Tony was waiting for Fury to say something about a particularly risky move he’d made in the last twenty minutes of the battle.

The aliens that had come through Strange’s portal weren’t dangerous, not really. Just curious and clumsy, and way too big to be walking about New York. Their main job was containment and Tony understood that, knew that those were his orders, but right around the time when they were rounding the second hour of trying to stop the creatures from sitting down and accidentally breaking Brooklyn, he’s gotten curious, that there had to be a better way. So he slipped through the open portal and took a quick look around. 

He’d saved the day, really. Found a secret weapon in the form of a high pitched whistle that called the entire hoard of the alien creatures back through the portal. Yes he did all this without telling his teammates, and yes, Strange  _ did _ almost close the portal with him on the other side because of that, but still. He made it out just fine and he fixed the entire problem. But none of that mattered here. None of that would make a difference to Fury or to S.H.I.E.L.D. 

This is the exact kind of thing that makes Tony Fury’s least favorite, and he knows that, so he’s fully expecting Fury’s rant. 

Steve beat him to it. 

He stormed in from the other room and the first words out of his mouth were, “Tony what the fuck do you even have the comms on for if you refuse to use them?” 

Tony turned in his seat to flash the man his most charming smile. “Mostly to make jokes and annoy you, Cap. Why else?” 

Steve’s jaw clenched. “Tony! This is not a joke! I feel like we do this every other mission. You can’t keep going against what we’ve agreed to do as a team without communicating with the rest of us!” 

“We only do this every other mission because you refuse to let me follow through on my ideas when I do share them with you. Why bother?” 

“You bother because maybe, and I know this is hard for you to imagine, but  _ maybe _ there are people who know more about the situation than you do and there is a reason we don’t want you to follow through on some of your plans,” Steve growled back. 

“Well why the fuck are you sending us into missions without all the in—” 

“Okay.” The screech of a chair being pushed back filled the room. “ I’m gonna just go ahead and declare this meeting finished before these two start hate fucking right here on the conference room table,” Nat said, clearly annoyed, before walking out of the room.

Clint snorted and followed behind her. Bruce shot both Steve and Tony a very tired look and pushed himself up as well. Thor didn’t seem bothered but followed the rest out anyway. 

Tony and Steve just stood there for a few minutes quietly before Steve looked at Tony and just shook his head. “You’re gonna get yourself killed one day, Tony. Just stop being stupid and talk to us, please.” Then he walks out. 

So yeah, it was a joke. 

But then it kept happening. 

Steve and Tony break out into an argument on team movie night and Clint groans before saying, “Just kiss already and put us all out of our misery.” 

Steve shows up at S.I. for a one on one with Tony to talk about the team and they only make it half way into lunch before having words. Pepper pops her head into Tony’s office and chimes in with a giggle. “How long are you both gonna tug on each other's proverbial pigtails like this before you just give up and date? 

Even Fury sighs frustratedly when yet another meeting dissolves into and argument between the two of them and says, “I’m about five seconds away from locking you both both in a room with a box of condoms and gun and hoping for the best” 

At first, it was easy for Tony to brush it off. His teammates like their jokes and he gets that. He jokes back most of the time. But the more people make the joke, the less like a joke it begins to feel. Clint and Nat is one thing, but Fury? He’s not sure Fury would be above locking them up. 

If he were to be honest with himself, a rarity in and of itself, but if he were honest, he could admit that the arguing with Steve is a bit of a turn on to him. Just a bit. 

The man is gorgeous and smart and he  _ never _ lets Tony win easily. Always make him go ten rounds. It’s always a challenge with Steve and  _ god _ it’s been so long since Tony found anybody who can actually challenge him. 

He could see their point, the others. He could see how the arguments he and Steve get into could be seen as a sort of foreplay. One minute they’re verbally sparring and the next they’d be using their mouths for something else. And that’s hot enough that he’s definitely let a scene play out in his mind one or twice while jacking off, but he’d never actually expect anything to happen. Not really. 

Except the next time Steve is in Tony’s workshop bothering him about fudging some details on a post battle report and Tony answers his annoying prod for an explanation with a snide remark, Tony finds himself couched between the wall and Steve’s firm body, moaning as the man pulls roughly at his hair and shoves his tongue into his mouth. 

He responds enthusiastically. Kisses him back with vigor and battles with himself over whether he wants to bend Steve over the workshop table or present him with his open throat. 

Eventually, when all the spit in Steve’s mouth is swapped with his own, he finds his way over to the drawer he keeps stocked with condoms and lube and grabs one of the little packets from inside, handing it to Steve as he drops to his knees, flutters his eyelashes and says, “Wanna teach me a lesson, Cap?” 

When they’re finished, both covered in come and spit and sweat, breathing heavily as they come down from their highs, Tony looks over at his Captain, disheveled and glistening and fucking beautiful and as he grins. “You feel better now?” 

Steve looks up at him, panting as he wipes his chin. “A little bit, yeah. You?” 

“Tons. Thank you for your utility.” 

Steve snorts. “My utility?” 

Tony nods, closing his eyes and rests his head back against Steve’s shoulder. “Yup. You did the trick, Cap. Got all my pent up “I wanna kill you” energy out when I let you fuck my throat. So um, you can get out now. I’m done with you.” He flicks his fingers in a shew motion. 

Steve looks at Tony uninterested for a moment and then leans forward and licks a drop of his own come off of the other man’s chest. “No you’re not,” he says confidently. 

Tony’s dick makes an interested twitch. He hums quietly. “Maybe not,” he admits. “Maybe you can stay for another round.”


End file.
